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[sithkabobed]

And there we go.

[Qui-Gon dips his head with a small smile and the slightest shrug of his left shoulder in the universal gesture for "I rest my case, fam" before falling into a few moments of reflective silence.]

[Briefly, he wonders what kind of role, if any, the Jedi would have taken in such a tumultuous time. Would they have been sucked into rebellious political turmoil? Would they have allowed it to happen in the first place?]

[...Or is it entirely possible that they would have become one of the oppressors under the misguided sense of justice? It's sobering to even entertain the idea that the Order he loved so much could have very well been part of the problem. Normally, if someone had postulated that kind of situation to him, they would have been met with a resounding and resolute counterargument. But after hearing all he has so far...]

[No. They wouldn't have. He has to continue to believe that.]

[Qui-Gon returns his attention to Leia, the creases around his eyes deepening, but his gaze alert. The troubling thoughts have been pushed aside for now in favor of conversation with the young woman at his bedside.]

[oratorical]

[He's free to return his attention to Leia, but her attention is on him, not so much on Alderaan and her family anymore. Because that look that came over him is a bit concerning, and she isn't sure what might have brought that about.]

Is everything all right?

[sithkabobed]

[As a naturally private man, Qui-Gon’s immediate response is to shrug off any prying, no matter the positive intent. It’s no different here.]

[He offers Leia a smile.]

I’m fine. Just a stray thought catching my attention. I apologize.

[oratorical]

[On one hand, Leia is happy to respect Qui-Gon's privacy. But on the other, it's clear something is bothering him, and he's listened to more than his fair share of her issues she feels comfortable sharing.]

If you need someone to lend an ear, I'm more than willing. You've helped me many times doing just that.

[sithkabobed]

[The smile falters, frozen between a decision between continuing with the façade or letting down his guard.]

[Qui-Gon's asked Leia to trust him with far more than what he could tell her now--her father's life being one of those things. And although she's right, this isn't a matter of giving and taking favors, but to allow for some vulnerability beyond his sorry physical state. That alone is enough to push him to reconsider what he wants to say.]

[And for a moment, he nearly does.]

[But he's speaking with Leia Organa, someone who he knows will never betray her word. She's shown far more integrity than most people Qui-Gon's wound up trusting in the past, so why not?]

[The smile slowly disappears. He's choosing to let down his guard. Just a little.]

...

I was thinking about the Jedi. What we, as an Order, would have done had we survived the rise of the Empire.

[oratorical]

[Leia's posture relaxes slightly, just barely. The subject matter is a hard one, one that doesn't make for pleasant conversation, but she's relieved that Qui-Gon trusts her enough to be open with her. At least as open as he can bring himself to be.]

What I know of the Order is mostly stories, all of which I'm sure were far from the reality.

[stories from the Clone Wars about dramatic battles and rescues, stories about her father's direct dealings with the Jedi, that sort of thing. Not much about exactly how the Order functioned, beyond what she'd been told here.]

But I can't imagine the Jedi wouldn't have joined us eventually.

[Well, it's more that she doesn't want to imagine it. She still believes the Jedi were primarily good and for the good of the galaxy. She can't imagine the Jedi wouldn't join the Rebellion, not when Luke joined and Obi-Wan helped when they needed him more than anything.]

[sithkabobed]

[No matter how many times he hears the Jedi being referred to as stories and myths, Qui-Gon will never be able to shirk the knot in his stomach at those words.]

[This time, though, that feeling of dread is tempered by the hopeful tone to Leia’s response, serving as a reminder of the virtues the Jedi Order stood for and pushing against his prior doubts.]

I’m glad you believe that.

Even in the Jedi Order’s prime, there were many who regarded us with suspicion and anger. I can only imagine the things that are said after the Empire’s takeover.

[oratorical]

Most try not to.

[She knows, because she was told stories about the Jedi from her father, and from her lessons. But most people opted to not talk about the Jedi, to pretend they never existed, and those that did talk about the Jedi didn't speak of them in favorable terms. ...For the obvious reason.]

But they were always spoken highly of on Alderaan.

[sithkabobed]

[Unlike the one from a few moments ago, the smile that spreads on Qui-Gon’s face is genuine. Melancholy, but genuine.]

I can only hope that I’m living up to that praise.

[oratorical]

[Well Qui-Gon has had his moments where they disagree and he infuriated her, certainly, but she'd like to think things are better between them now, and that she better understands the sort of Jedi Qui-Gon is.]

I think you're the sort of Jedi I would have liked to have as a tutor when I was younger.

[Tutor, advisor, or something. She can't imagine she wouldn't have had to learn more about the Jedi, were more of them around.]

[sithkabobed]

Thank you for the compliment, but I can't help but question your taste in Jedi.

[He arches his eyebrows as he shoots Leia a wry glance.]

Obi-Wan makes a far better representative of what the Order stands for than I.

[oratorical]

He might. But I've never quite been a perfect representative of what a princess should be, myself.

[Well that and she finds herself agreeing and understanding more of Qui-Gon's beliefs than Obi-Wan's.]

[sithkabobed]

In that case, I will be happy to share whatever knowledge I have with you.

[Because hey, what's wrong with fueling an already rebellious spirit even further?]